Wednesday, October 24, 2007

Girls vs Boys

One morning while having breakfast in the lobby of the hotel on our mini vacation, a group of soldiers in fatigues came in.

Ni Ni pipes up and says, "All the boys in this room except Dad have matching clothes on...."

Leave it to a girl to recognize fashion sense of soldiers.....A boy would have asked where they were going to fight or if they had a gun, etc.

Vacation? The ugly, the bad and the good...

I know the phrase is usually "the good, the bad and the ugly" but I wanted to put the good at the end....

We decided last week to take advantage of the children's 4 day weekend off from school and take a mini-vacation.

The ugly:

Hotel noise, hotel beds, yada, yada....
Trying to take everyone out to eat all the time.....Why is it that every restaurant looks at you as if you're crazy if you say "3 children, 2 adults and a carseat"?
Dirty looks for nursing in public (even though there was complete coverage)
Me threatening the children within an inch of their lives when they don't want to spend time doing something Dad wanted to do on vacation - how dare I ask them to tolerate 60 minutes in a museum that Mom and Dad found interesting.....

The bad:

Children who start out asking "are we there yet?" 10 minutes from home.
The restaurant that brings us 3 dinner rolls for our party of 6 and informs they have to charge us for extras (even though they didn't carry thru on the threat)".
6 of us in a room about the size of my living room (along with our "stuff").

The good (negates both of the above):

The FUN we had! The things we learned! Spending time together without the pressure of the world on our backs!

Tuesday, October 16, 2007

a note to my neighbors....

To the mom of the 12 yr old, what made you think that the child would actually shoot paintballs at ONLY the 12 x 12 cardboard box??? (Pink paintball paint does wash off the house, at least when its still wet)

To the mom of the 7 yr old, please do not send your child over as soon as we pull in the drive to see if she can play here - I am not a babysitting service - do not self-invite. Also, don't send her over again 5 minutes later when I tell her the first time that the kids have 15 minutes of homework to do.....

To the guy who thinks detailing and revving his engine at 10 pm for 30 minutes plus is okay....it's not!!!!

Monday, October 15, 2007

My kids

For all the posts about the frustration, there are many smiles that I only get from my children....

For instance,

the facts that Sha Sha finds interesting about Kansas History - like that it used to be a law that vanilla ice cream could not be served on cherry pie.

for instance,

the boy has started playing coin "magic tricks". Guess which hand it's in? (But you can only guess the one in front of your face, the one behind the back doesn't count.)

for instance,

NiNi's curiousity about everything! While eating chinese food the other night, "Mom, what's in crab rangoon?" After I list the ingredients, including crab of course, "EWW! I hate crab!!! First I've heard of it considering she eats them every time we have Chinese and half of one is on her plate.... I guess it's silly to think crab might be in CRAB rangoon.....

for instance,

GiGi was sitting on my lap today while I was typing an email and she kicked the keyboard tray by accident, but of course then it became a fun game to kick the keyboard tray out from under mommy's hands. Giggle, Giggle....

Lots of laughs and smiles amidst the gnashing of teeth......

Library books

Sha Sha (9 yr old) is usually the responsible one. I say usually because she is after all, 9 years old. We tore the house up (and the cars) over the weekend looking for a public library book that was due last week. Sha Sha swore she looked everywhere (as did everyone else in the family). This was a tiny book. A short story really....maybe 4 or 5 inches by six inches, I was beginning to think the cat ate it....

Anyway, after school today, we decide to go to library to pay for the lost book. Stopping by home to pick up our library bags (which is where the books are supposed to reside when not being read), Sha Sha miraculously finds the lost book......IN THE LIBRARY BAG!!!!!!!


AAAAAUUUUUGGGHHHH!!!!!!!!

what to say?

My absence has been the result of a couple of things -

1 - being busy (What mom of 4 isn't? - Nix that, what mom isn't?)
2- fear of being redundant
3 - some serious prayer and contemplation

Am I at a point where there is resolution? Some.... But growth and change aren't productive without a little pain, now are they?

Tuesday, October 9, 2007

Thank you

to my anonymous benefactor. If you read this, you'll know what I'm talking about, and yet I don't have any other way to Thank you.....

Catch up

Wow a week goes by fast. Gigi is rolling all over (when she wants to) - not on a performance basis, mind you!

I backed away from some commitments, and that makes me feel better about things.

I still have trouble getting dinner on the table sometimes and feel bogged down by the "dailies". I am also feeling guilty for doing anything that might be enjoyable when I have "stuff" to do. Feeling guilty, I know is a weapon of the enemy, but I can't seem to shake it.

All of my children are such a joy, but Nini is such a delight recently. She has noticed my "moods" and tries to say things to cheer me up or make me laugh, and she usually succeeds. She is also always sneaking up on me with a surprise hug or two.

Wednesday, October 3, 2007

Revelation

or not? Anyway, sometimes we just need to be reminded of all the lies we buy into. I wrap my value up so much into what I fail at doing, or what is not done perfectly, that I forget how God see's me thru His eyes. Thanks to you know who at Bible Study for the reminder and Thank you God for directing her to share.

I don't know who sings it but the song lyrics that follow hit me hard yesterday -
"You make all things glorious. What does that make me?"

Bathroom duty

If any of you have little boys - you will identify...

I walk into the "kids" bathroom and besides toothpaste all over the vanity (which I have already pontificated about in an earlier post), the "aroma" hits me. What "aroma" you may ask? What to call it?

"Eau de Pee-pee"
"Missing the Toilet fragrance" or how about
"Urine Couture".

Anyway, does their aim ever improve?

Monday, October 1, 2007

Why is it ...

that when you expect a store to honor an advertised price and point it out, they act like they are doing you a favor by giving it to you?

that no matter how early you get up, you still can't get out the door when you want to?

that my 9 yr old now finds herself qualified to correct my spelling?

that my 7 yr old is qualified to correct my grammar?

Sunday, September 30, 2007

Communion conversation

Pastor did communion with the kids in service today. I leaned over and made sure the boy realized that he wasn't going to partake. He did remarkably well. It has been a while since we did communion with him present.

After the crackers were passed out, I leaned over to remind him of the signifigance. He asked when they were passing out the cheese....

Thursday, September 27, 2007

What you don't know, can't hurt you?

Nini just finished dinner and asked for pudding. No problem.

As she is eating she exclaims, "I am spoiled!"

And I say, "What makes you say that?"

"I get pudding, ice cream, sweet stuff at Grandma's....

and of course, all the stuff you don't know about?"

Hmm.....

Who out there is sneaking her treats?

The gift...

Picture if you will....

I am driving after picking Hubby up for lunch with Gigi and the boy. (That's another post - never take a 3 month old and a 4 yr old to any restaurant without a clown as a mascot and expect to get to actually eat...)

Anyway, Hubby gets excited and tells me, "I bought you a gift last night!"

My secondary love language is gifts, so I too get excited! I picture shiny things wrapped in small packages....I wonder "When did he have time to hit the mall?"

He exclaims, "I purchased you your own domain name!!!" "Isn't that great?"

"Yeah" I reply (with moderate enthusiasm). (Now you know why I call him the computer geek - but he is MY computer geek!!!)

Thanks, sweetie!

Wednesday, September 26, 2007

Milestones

Gigi rolled over and back....
Now she rolls over in bed and gets mad and can't go to sleep.

The boy has made a new set of friends at preschool, a new identity outside my sphere of influence. The apron strings have been loosened....
God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change;
courage to change the things I can;
and wisdom to know the difference.

Living one day at a time;
Enjoying one moment at a time;
Accepting hardships as the pathway to peace;
Taking, as He did, this sinful world as it is, not as I would have it;
Trusting that He will make all things right if I surrender to His Will;
That I may be reasonably happy in this life and supremely happy with Him Forever in the next.
Amen.
--Reinhold Niebuhr

I have always seen the first part of this prayer, but never the rest. When I feel like I am flying from one day/event/commitment to the next I often wonder if I am surrendering to His will. I sometimes feel like I am not slowing down enough or seeking Him enough to find His will.

Thursday, September 20, 2007

All sound the same

All my posts are starting to sound the same....

Tired, over-committed, discouraged (pity party here) me.

I guess I forget to mention the good things. The grins, smiles, giggles, jokes and everything good in my life.

All a matter of perspective. Bible study Tuesday reminded me that anything worth anything is hard to some degree. Easy isn't worthwhile. Why would I want that?

Do I seek Him diligently and with my whole heart in EVERY circumstance (not just the BIG stuff)?

In Remembrance

A couple that I know was separated yesterday. He was "promoted" to Heaven. Noone expected it. They had been married over 50 years. It makes me want to cherish every moment with my hubby. They truly loved each other and served the church and Christ. I know that God is comforting her and using the church as a vessel to do that.

He was a man of character, a man who was always ready with a smile and a hug, and somewhat like a grandpa to myself and my kids.

I thank God for his life and how it touched our family. I praise God for his "promotion". I pray that I make a difference in others lives the way he did.

Monday, September 17, 2007

Things I love to hear....

I love you mommy!
Mommy, read to us!
Mommy, can you play a game with us?
I want to be a mommy just like you someday and have 10 kids! (Good luck with that, honey!!)

Things I never hear...

Thank you mommy for washing my laundry so I have clean clothes to wear to school.
Thank you for checking my homework and making sure I do it right so that I learn something.
Thank you for not letting me rot my brain with too much tv and video games.
I LOVE your cooking!
Wow! The house looks great! (I couldn't even say this one without laughing!!)

Things I hear WAY too frequently

"SOMEBODY'S poopy!"

"Oopsies!" usually followed by something like "Does silly putty come out of furniture?" or "Can I have another glass of red kool-aid?"

"He/She looked at me!! (whine added for emphasis)"

"So and so has one!!"

"Can we (insert your favorite)...
Watch tv/movie/cartoons?"
Play on the computer?"
Play a video game?"

"I can't concentrate ...can you make everyone be quiet?" (No easy task with 4 kids)

"Can I hold the baby?"

"Can I have a snack?" (meaning fruit snacks - which, face it, are not a snack....)

"Where's my (once again, insert your favorite)
shoes?"
gym shorts?"
soccer cleats, shinguards, socks, jersey?" (Just one or any combination of these....)
hairbrush?"
backpack/lunchbox/homework?"

"Eew! I'm not hungry!" (With dinner staring them in the face....and five minutes ago they were clamoring for a snack).

Thursday, September 13, 2007

If I didn't have enough...

Well, I did it! I volunteered myself for two more things this week on top of my crazy life. I almost added a third today as well. I actually stopped myself today. One of the things I did committ to is a one time event and the other is a very short term project.

I am not sorry that I did it. Just a little nervous about doing justice to the situations. I want to do it to make things better for others in addition to myself.

Can you guess what my love language is? Yep...Acts of Service. And I assume everyone else is ministered to in the same way. (Not saying there isn't some selfishness involved, too. I also benefit from one of the projects...)

I was going to to a garage sale this Saturday, but a few things are getting in the way -

1) I sliced my foot open on a lego tonight and I am limping around pretty good. Kind of hard to organize a garage sale like that.
2) They are resurfacing our street tomorrow. Normally that wouldn't stop me. They did a couple of nearby streets today and I could smell it all thru the house and had a headache from the fumes. What will it be like tomorrow?
3) Weathermen have thrown rain possibilities into the forecast for Saturday.
4) Sleep. I am craving some and don't think I can give it up to stay up until 1 am Saturday trying to get organized.

Bless my sweet husband. He has by default been roped into one of these projects, and has not whined or groaned once (at least not in front of me). I guess he is remembering the phrase, "If Mama isn't happy, ain't nobody happy.

Thanks sweetie! I owe you one (more).

Wednesday, September 12, 2007

Crest is rolling in the dough...

from my children. Am I the only one who finds half a tube of toothpaste regularly on the bathroom vanity, floor, wall, door, and of course - carpet in the hallway?

Monday, September 10, 2007

P.S. - & Kudos

Hubby returned from store with flavored gourmet coffee and chocolate with caramel....

Does he know me? You bet. Love ya, hon...

My day

6:45 - Wake up, brush teeth & feed baby.
7:00 - Wake up rest of kids (actually just one who really whined. Other two are already up asking for breakfast.
7:10 - Iron school clothes (Should have done it last night, I know).
7:20 - Make lunches
7:35 - Throw roast in crock pot for dinner. Peel potatoes to throw in with baby carrots.
7:45 - Ask Nini about her missing lunch box.
7:47 - Ask Nini about missing lunch box, a little LOUDER.
7:50 - Ask about homework sign off sheets and gym clothes (once again should have been done last night.
7:55 - Throw on clothes, brush hair, look for keys, cell phone, checkbook, etc.
7:57 - Yell at husband for taking my cell phone, oops - not mine after all!
8:00 - Load up baby & kids in van & leave for school.
8:13 - Arrive at school. Wait for fundraising orders from parents.
8:30 - Have heart-to-heart with pastor. Cry.
8:45 - Wait for orders.....
9:15 - Take inventory...
9:35 - Go to bank...
10:00 - Arrive home and make phone call. Feed baby.
BREATHE!!!
11:30 - Eat breakfast.
12:15 - Pick up The Boy from preschool.
12:30 - Make Lunch for the boy and dinner for family at church.
1:30 - Feed Baby.
2:10 - Leave to deliver dinner.
2:20 - Get lost. Call husband for directions. Interrupt meeting. Hang up. Still lost. Break down and call family for directions (twice) and look stupid.
2:45 - Leave family's home.
3:10 - Eat lunch in car.
3:20 - Pick up girls from school.
3:45 - Arrive home. Supervise homework.
4:00 - Make phone call to clear up possible misunderstanding with a friend.
4:30 - Finish supervising homework.
5:00 - Get Sha Sha ready for soccer.
5:30 - Feed Baby.
6:00 - Feed the boy and NiNi.
6:15 - Eat dinner.
6:30 - Save Gigi from shaken baby syndrome by NiNi and the boy.
7:00 - Bathe the Boy.
7:15 - Put NiNi in shower. Play Memory with the boy. Lose at Memory (Legitimately, too! I could barely stay awake.)
7:45 - Read chapter book with kids while feeding baby.
8:30 - Kids to bed.
8:35 - Catch up on day with hubby.
8:50 - Put baby to bed. Send hubby to store.
9:00 - Type letter to school parents.
9:30 - Vent on Blog.....
9:50 - Give up and eat chocolate with a Dr. Pepper chaser....while reading my devotional.
10:00 - Fall asleep wishing to sleep for 10 hours..... (knowing it all starts over tomorrow....)


Add in a dozen diaper changes, and an emergency bathroom run for the boy in the van, pumping gas, and another phone call to encourage another friend and I'd say it was a little busy.....

Saturday, September 8, 2007

Delayed Gratification

I have thought a lot about this topic this week thanks to a sermon. I'm not sure that was the whole point, but that part stuck out.

How did it affect me this week?

I didn't go out to lunch when I wanted to, and we ate at home most of the week, even when I was fighting the cold and felt lousy, I didn't call Pizza Hut! Yea for me!

I didn't go out and buy new clothes on credit, since mine are falling off of me! Once again, yea for me for losing the weight! (Although I am going to have to find $ to buy something soon, seriously, you don't want to see me walking around with my pants around my ankles....)

I resisted the after soccer ice cream cones...

I went garage saling, and didn't buy anything! (Actually, I did buy a wagon...)

Anyway, it has made me think about things more this week, and I think that's a good thing...

I didn't let it get in the way of a Starbuck's run, though.....

Devotional....

Earlier this week I was doing a devotional and read a line that made me chuckle and has stuck with me...I probably won't quote it correctly, but it was something along the lines of ...

"Cleaning house with young children is like shoveling snow while it is still snowing."

That is so true...

I keep venting about that same thing. I know it sounds elementary but one thing that I thought to myself was that if you don't shovel the snow during a bad snowstorm, you can become snowbound very easily. The job is easier when done in increments. I think that applies to the whole housecleaning thing too. A little laundry is easier to tackle than a mountain....

Slacker....

Okay, so I haven't blogged in a week....

But, I have dealt with a cold rippling thru the house.
I have had soccer start for 2 of the three munchkins.
I did accomplish making dinner most nights this week.
I did do a LOT of laundry....

and I am getting really good at making excuses...

Truth is, I had been contemplating about the idea of whether or not the blog is useful or if it just another means for me to complain and supplement the escalation of a bad attitude. While I do realize that it has, on occasion, been something of a tool for the escalation, I also know that it has been somewhat therapuetic.

So, I do think I'll continue. Maybe not on a daily basis, but, who knows?

Thursday, August 30, 2007

Generation gap

"Mommy, Ali's daddy has an old-fashioned car?"

Thoughts of a polished classic loom in my head. I wonder what model & year it is. "Oh really" I say.

"Yeah, you can't push a button to roll down the windows, you have to crank them..."

Tuesday, August 28, 2007

Actual conversation

Ni Ni and the boy were having a conversation with me about family relationships yesterday.

This is basicly how it went -

"Uncle Steve is your brother?" (names changed to keep me from being in trouble...)
giggles inserted here
"Yes"
and "Grandma Sally is your mom?"
"Yes"
and "Grandpa John is your dad?"
"Yes"
"Why don't they live together?"
"Mommy's parents aren't married anymore?"
"Why not?"

What followed was my best explanation of what divorce is.

Ni Ni pops in and says "I know why it's bad for people to divorce and then marry someone else?"

Curious, I ask "Why?"

With a grimace on her face she replies "Because when you get married you kiss each other on the mouth and if you then marry someone else you can pass on germs!!!"

I hope she still has this attitude about kissing when she's 18....make that 25!
I feel like we accomplished very little today.

In truth - we actually accomplished a lot.

As the educator, we all watched a good-sized spider disassemble her web on the outside of our patio door. (I've never seen that...) Supervision of homework.

As the taxi driver, trips to school and preschool to drop off, trip to preschool to pick up, trip to gas station, trip to store to buy tools to fix car, trip to doctor for shots, trip to school to pick up, trip to auto shop to drop off car to be fixed.

As the comforter, for a 2 month old who didn't deal well with shots.

Not to mention, ironing school clothes, feeding the baby every 2 hours (part of the comforting), making lunches, etc.

After reading that - Now I'm exhausted, but feeling better about the laundry that didn't get done today..

Monday, August 27, 2007

A Barber of Seville?

Okay, silly title, I know...

Last night hubby finally gave in and let me cut his hair. I have never been allowed anywhere close to his head with the clippers. After we got the clipper blades adjusted, I think it was fairly painless. (His story may be different).

I once watched a movie where a woman cut a man's hair and it was made out to be a sensual experience. Granted we cut off a LOT of hair, but I don't see how it can be considered sensual when you are both covered in loose, itchy hair. Maybe it's more of a power trip kind of thing...

Anyway when we were done, He looked in the mirror and said "I asked for Matt Lauer and I got Al Roker!" To which I replied, "I can't work miracles!"

Saturday, August 25, 2007

A good laugh

A Merry heart doeth good like medicine, right?

I snuck a bite of meat at dinner as I was dishing up dinner tonight. NiNi saw me and said - "Don't eat it all" - As if I always eat everything and never leave anything for them.... It added to my bad mood...

Then, I made a comment to Hubby that everything looks better with a little sleep. To which NiNi replies "It also looks better with your glasses on." (Enter rimshot here).

I laughed so hard!! I told her I loved her and she looked at me like I belonged in a straightjacket!

Hubby then told her that she had been redeemed. To which she replied, "By the blood of the Lamb."

Thank you God and NiNi for a good laugh. I needed it!

Why so down?

I am somewhat reluctant to publish this post. I guess I don't want to be judged. The whole idea of starting this blog was to be able to hash out some feelings and ideas and vent a little. So, here goes -

I am feeling very isolated right now. No matter what I do to reach out, I feel shoved into a corner that I cannot get out of. I feel like I could drop off the face of the earth and noone would notice.

I am so tired of running thru the motions every day to have the family rip it all apart so I can repeat the process. I am tired of noone noticing that I worked so hard to make it nice and they don't want to help maintain without being asked, begged or yelled at. I am tired of being the drill master and never the "fun" parent.

I am afraid of rejection too. Afraid of reaching out to befriend others only to find they don't really want me as a friend.

That all said - I know several truths that negate these feelings:

First, that I matter to God and my family. God has given me gifts, talents and abilities that are unique to me. I am important to my family and they would notice if I was gone.

Second, that the enemy, Satan, is on the prowl for those he could devour, and I AM NOT going to give him permission to do that to me! How does a lion devour his prey? He ISOLATES them from the herd before he attacks! I am not a "zebra" who is going to allow herself to be isolated even if the enemy would like me to believe that I already am!

Third, Satan also uses fear as a tool to make us doubt who we are in Christ and to keep us from reaching out to each other. Because together, we are stronger and can make a real difference.

And Lastly, I know lack of sleep with a newborn intensifies all these feelings! My time is wisely spent on my baby and family right now.

So, even though I FEEL like I do. I KNOW it isn't true! That doesn't mean I won't shed a few tears, but I do know that God will dry them all if I go to Him.

Misspoken

The boy and I had cheap Chinese food for lunch on Thursday with Dad. When NiNi asked what we had for lunch, he stated matter of factly

Spotted recently...

On a church marquee....

although I can't remember the exact wording, it was something along the lines of "In the afterlife there's smoking and non-smoking". I couldn't help laughing.

Tuesday, August 21, 2007

what did they do before the internet?

Sha Sha and I were out alone together this last weekend and she was full of questions about everything. Needless to say, questions that I did not have an adequate answer for. I liked it when my answers sufficed and she thought I was the smartest person in the world. I know it is vain and selfish, but who doesn't want their child to think those things about them.

Anyway, we used the internet later that day to look up answers and she was happy. I learned a few things too.

Did you know that the color of a fire hydrant indicates the water flow per minute from said hydrant? Did you know that hurricanes used to be named after just women and before that, just identified by the latitude and longitude? How about that the abbreviation lbs. for pounds comes from the Latin word libra?

And the children shall lead us....

Sunday, August 19, 2007

fall routine

School is underway and the siblings are all excited. I listened yesterday to how "interesting" they thought the school year and the curriculum was going to be this year.

I know things are going to be hectic for a week or two, until we all get adjusted to the new routine.

False advertising and wildlife encounter

Sha Sha has succumbed to the advertising blitz put on by the zoo. They advertised like crazy for their special exhibit this year, which happened to be koalas. Sha Sha asked repeatedly if we were going to go. She has a particular fondness for koalas. I kept telling her we would do our best. The exhibit ends next week and I told her last week when she asked again I wasn't sure if we were going to make it. The temperatures have been so hot and Gigi is so little... Needless to say Sha Sha was quite disappointed, to the point of tears.

So first thing yesterday, we went to the zoo to see the koalas. We headed to see them first, because we were not staying to see the whole zoo and it would surely turn hot soon. When we arrived at the cage to see the cute, adorable koalas they were sound asleep with their backs to curious onlookers. I could have propped a fuzzy pillow in a tree in the backyard and called it a koala and saved myself $40! The docent at the display informed us that they sleep 22 hours a day and could be viewed at the 3:00pm weighing and feeding and they would be awake then.

Why advertise a cute adorable animal that is only awake 2 hours a day? I know none of the ads had sleeping koalas....

During the same trip to the zoo, the boy had an encounter that could have been very bad. The kangaroos at the zoo are free roaming in an area near a path. While the rest of our family was observing a small joey 2 feet away from us separated from the herd (are a group of kangaroos called a herd?), the boy was creeping up on a kangaroo a little larger than him on the other side of the path. We hear another onlooker say "oh, no" and I KNOW it is the boy. I turn around and about freak because I can see the look in the kangaroo's eyes. It says "Come on, buddy, wanna box?"

Needless to say it was all resolved okay, but I'm sure the boy's guardian angel was standing at attention and calling in reinforcements for the rest of our visit.

Wednesday, August 15, 2007

There's always tomorrow

I did well today smiling and saying things were fine. I collapsed at almost 4:00 when I returned home to a sink full of dishes, 4 loads of laundry to be folded and 1 to be rewashed in the washing machine (it sat too long in 100 degree plus heat). I have a ton to do for the first day of school tomorrow. Copies to be made. Labeling of school supplies. Setting out and ironing of school clothes. Camera batteries to charge. I'm exhausted just thinking about it all.

You are probably saying..... If she has so much to do, why is she blogging. Because I need to vent and this is better than taking it out on my kids or my husband. You can just not read it and you don't have to hear the fear in my voice over the possibility that something will go undone. (Which, by the way, I did have happen today.)

Dinner is cooking and I am praying Gigi stays asleep until its finished and I've had a chance to eat it....

Okay, venting and self-pity aside, I know moms (and dads) all over the country are doing the same thing right now and if for some reason it doesn't all get done - there's always tomorrow. Maybe the "Merry Maids Fairy Godmother" will make a visit tonight...

Tuesday, August 14, 2007

crazy day

I feel like I've been running all day. It is extremely hot and I think that has made us all tired.

I was thinking this morning that sometimes I'd just like to say to my kids - "just wait a minute, will ya?" Who am I fooling - I do say that to them, frequently too. I am thankful that God doesn't do that to me when I go to him....

Friday, August 10, 2007

Miscellaneous

Our trip out yesterday morning went quite well. We had to go to 2 banks, drop off paperwork 2 places and finish school shopping. We also made a quick trip to the thrift store. Gigi slept thru all the errands. We were out about 3 hours. All the moms sigh with me! Then, Gigi stayed up most of the afternoon and crashed about 8 pm. So I felt like I didn't get a lot accomplished yesterday afternoon around the house.

I just have to readjust to having a baby around who depends so much on me. I had gotten so use to the older kids being so self-sufficient.

The start of school for all the kids is consuming our time. Soccer practices also start the same week. Sha Sha has practice every other Monday and every Thursday. NiNi has long practices on Tuesday, and The Boy starts clinics on Saturdays.

If you don't see much of us, you'll know why....

Gotta go get a load of laundry in and grab a cup of coffee before Gigi wakes up and wants to eat....

Tuesday, August 7, 2007

Good Buddies

Hubs used to play "Good Buddies" with his younger brother. "Good Buddies" was basically walkie-talkies. I guess it comes naturally to boys, because The Boy was trying to use the baby monitor receiver yesterday as a walkie talkie to talk back to the baby and was quite irritated when he didn't think she heard him....

The Boy

The Boy and I have been battling it out and hubby and I have decided that he is struggling to find his place in the family now that he is no longer the baby. We have also decided to put him in "school" two mornings a week. We still have to get the details worked out, but hopefully he'll start around the time the girls start school.

I think it will be good for him to have people his own age to play with sometimes and the teaching certainly won't hurt. I also think it will prepare him some for kindergarten structure. I sound like I'm talking myself into it, don't I?

Over my head

Have you ever made a commitment to something and then wondered if you were in over your head? I have done that recently. I made a commitment to something that I really feel God has for me to do, but now I am questioning exactly how it is going to happen....

I know that the challenge and stepping out of my comfort zone is a good thing, that's the only time growth can happen. I know that I CAN do it, but I question whether or not it will be to the standard expected....

I also know that Satan puts these doubts in my head to keep me from living up to my potential and what God has for me. I keep quoting Jeremiah, "For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. I also keep quoting Phil 4:6 "Don't worry about anything; instead, pray about everything. Tell God what you need, and thank him for all he has done. If you do this, you will experience God's peace."

Sunday, August 5, 2007

A return to normalcy?

Well, ShaSha and NiNi made it back from camp in one piece. They enjoyed themselves and learned a lot. We have had some conversations about things they learned and I am glad we made the investment. They were also exhausted. They went to bed at 9 pm and there was no half hour of giggling and talking (they are girls after all). They slept until 9:30 am and we had to wake them up to get ready for church. NiNi could have slept another 2 hours.....She will be the teenager who wants to sleep until noon on Saturday.

Sha Sha was glad to be home in her own bed and said she missed all of us. Ni Ni said she didn't miss the boy at all but as soon as she came in the door they were glued together and playing. Ni Ni also said she forgot she had a baby sister while she was gone.... ShaSha replied that she should be glad that Gigi isn't old enough to have her feelings hurt.

Gigi is grinning more today. That made the 3 am feeding more bearable. That and the fact that I had a shift of sleeping from 11 pm until 3 am....

Hubs tells be that he likes to read my blog to see what I am thinking. He also tells me that I should never write erroneously about him for the world to see.

Gigi thinks that anytime I hold her is a good time to sleep. Hubs gets most of the grins and coos outside of the ceiling fans of course. It makes me a little jealous, but on the other hand, he can always get her to sleep, so I should be rejoicing....

I don't know how single parents can do this. God definitely designed families the way he did for a reason. Parenting is a team sport....

Saturday, August 4, 2007

I NEED Caffiene

Well, it was another 3 am night....and up again at 6 to eat and stirring now at 9:30 am.

It did give us an opportunity to watch a movie last night that wasn't too bad. It was called "Stick It" and it was basically a commentary on girls competitive gymnastics. There were a few things that I could have lived without.....But overall, a decent way to kill time while waiting for Gigi to sleep.

I gave up coffee at about 8 mos pregnant because of acid and heartburn issues. I really haven't had but maybe 1 or two since then, which would be about 2 1/2 mos....

The more 3 am nights that I have, the more tempted I am to give in and jump back on the caffeiene express.

Gigi only has 1 1/2 weeks until school starts to get this sleeping thing worked out. I wouldn't mind getting up at 3 am for a feeding as long as I had a shift of sleeping before that. What is killing me is the fact that she falls asleep at 8 pm or so and gets up at 11 and wants to stay awake until 3.

You know what, Starbucks - here I come!

Friday, August 3, 2007

THE Boy vs. Mom

Today was a difficult day. The Boy got his own breakfast and left out 1/2 gallon of milk. By the time I made it to the kitchen and saw said milk, it was too far gone.

Every time I put Gigi down to nap today, The Boy would go in to comfort her every time she stirred. Keep in mind that his idea of comfort is to scream "That's okay baby" while giving her the equivalent of a good slap on the head. Needless to say that Gigi didn't respond too well.

The Boy also did several things that he knew he shouldn't to get Mom's attention today. Sneaking in Mom's bedroom to watch TV without permission. Throwing his laundry on the bedroom floor instead of putting it away and just all out ignoring Mom's directions. These things were all performed while Mom was feeding Gigi. We certainly have jealousy issues....

I did sit down and play Memory with him this morning and curled up in bed this morning with him to watch cartoons.

I did end up in tears as I felt that I was spread too thin. Yes this is the same mom who two days ago was lamenting the joy of having the burden lightened by having two at camp.....

I suppose the lack of sleep last night didn't help the situation any either...

Thursday, August 2, 2007

The honeymoon is over...

Well, after 3 nights of sleep, Gigi has decided that nighttime sleep is not for her again. 3 am seems really late when THE Boy is up at 6 am.

Besides being really tired, there isn't much new to report....

THE Boy is out with Grandma tonight and Hubs and I are alone with only Gigi. I wish we would have appreciated the 1 child situation more with the first.

I should go accomplish some things. Laundry, dishes, decluttering....

or maybe I'll sleep....

Wednesday, August 1, 2007

Missing you...

It may be a little corny, but I am already missing ShaSha and NiNi. I know they are having a great time and learning a lot, and that makes it better.

I miss their smiles and believe it or not, their chatter. It is soooo quiet.

I anly dropped them off 23 1/2 hours ago....

I also miss their help with the chores.....

All a matter of perspective....

Going from 4 kids to 2 for the week has reminded me that our perspective on life is so tinted by our personal experience.

For example, I didn't cringe today when hubby suggested I bring the 2 out for lunch with him, but had he suggested this when my Ni-Ni (2nd) was 6 weeks old, I would have laughed in his face....

When I had just one child I wondered how stay-at-home moms got anything done. Now when I am home with just one, I feel like I can accomplish anything....

The fact is that this translates to all areas of our life, including our spiritual walk. The more we are in The Word and learning and growing the more our horizons can be expanded and our perspectives on life can change. When God puts an opportunity in front of us, we can respond differently than we may have years or even months ago.

Tuesday, July 31, 2007

Nicknames

I am not fond of nicknames. I don't know why exactly. Possible nicknames are always in mind when I pick my children's names. We nixed so many names with the kids because of name shortening nicknames. Needless to say - hubs has already dubbed the baby with one that the other kids are picking up on - and I cringe when I hear it. I'll probably be using it by next week....or next month, tops.

That all said I've finally dubbed the children with nicknames (for the purpose of the blog only, mind you!!)

9 yr old daughter - Sha-Sha
7 yr old daughter - Ni-Ni
4 yr old son - THE Boy
5 wk old daughter - Gi-Gi

Now let me explain -

Sha Sha and Ni Ni were nicknames THE Boy gave the girls when he was learning to talk and they stuck (only within the family). Despite my loathing of nicknames - I still use Ni Ni's frequently as an endearment.

THE Boy is self explanatory.

Gigi was hubby's idea. 5 wk old is very gassy and he said it should be G&G for Gas and more Gas. I won't tell her how she got this nickname - as long as you don't.

Leakproof? Ha!!

What ever happened to the Luvs leakproof guarantee? They should test these things on my baby....She would give them a run for the money.

Camp jitters...

Not me mind you. Sha-Sha (9 yr old) is ready to go, third year and all. Ni-Ni (7 yr old) has talked about nothing else for 6 months. But last night on the eve of camp I think she started to get nervous. What was the first sign?

- "Mommy I don't want you to cry when I leave....maybe I shouldn't go...."

or could it be...

- "Mommy I don't want to stay in a cabin without a lock"....(you can tell we are city dwellers). When I explained all the reasons locks weren't necessary - her response was "what about bears coming in?" I calmly informed her that bears can't open doors as Sha-Sha says "yeah - the doors open out, not in!"


I exit room and laugh hysterically.

Friday, July 27, 2007

5 weeks..

The baby is 5 weeks old now. It seems to have flown by already. We are all rejoicing over the sweet expressions and coos...

When you become a parent of your first, everyone tells you to cherish it and that it all goes by so fast. You roll your eyes and think that the sleepless nights will never end.

By the time you get to your fourth (and hopefully final) you realize how right they all were. I look at my nine year old and realize it seems like just yesterday that hubs and I were ecstatic with her first smile....

Sniff! My babies are all growing up and I WILL enjoy them while I can.....

even if it means dirty dishes waiting for a while in the sink
even if it means a kitchen floor that needed to be mopped yesterday
even if it means I didn't get accomplished all I had planned today....

I am going to go peer at their angelic faces and rejoice in the wonderful gifts God has entrusted to us....

Thursday, July 26, 2007

Talents and Wal-Mart with 4

Mine is definitely not blogging! I can't seem to find the time, much less to have anything interesting to say!!

Just call me crazy. I took all 4 to Wal-Mart yesterday. It was not a good idea. I wanted one thing and once I was there kept thinking of other things we needed. I didn't want to waste the trip....

Here's a lowdown of what happened....

Halfway thru the store, can't find the original item we were looking for....can't find anyone to help....

Baby has BLOWOUT diaper and starts to Scream. We head to bathroom for a change. Halfway thru change 4 yr old runs out bathroom door.....

Finish in bathroom and baby is now screaming because after a diaper change she is awake and is convinced I plan to starve her....

Walk now back to area where I think item I need is - whole time holding a screaming baby in one hand and trying to help the 9 year old steer the cart with the other because she can't see over the carseat. The 4 yr old is trying to help steer from the front, but only succeeds in getting the cart cockeyed and blocking every aisle. Meantime the 7 yr old wants to shop, after all she has brought her purse and has money to burn thru....

What was I thinking....

Monday, July 23, 2007

Busted!!

Conviction has come my directions from several sources in the last two days. God's word, pastor's sermon, and a link on a friend's blog. It couldn't be more obvious than a bolt of lightning......

Don't get me wrong - I don't feel dejected or bashed over the head, just gently corrected and steered away, like something you would do with your toddler when they become distracted from a task.... (That might not be the right analogy - comparing myself to a toddler....hmmmm...)

Anyway - with all the "venting" - my attitude has been a little lackluster....
Time for a I've been doing a lot more griping and a lot less rejoicing.....Do I feel like rejoicing? Not really, sleep deprived and grumpy I can do. Rejoicing takes effort. I don't have the energy...

The difference in ME when I begin to focus on the positives and not the negatives! When I focus on the beautiful healthy children God has given me, instead of the sleepless nights and trips to the doctor for a few things here and there. I think about the parents who have sleepless nights because of a critically ill child, or who spend life savings on doctors to receive the runaround about a diagnosis... God has blessed me tremendously!

I complain about my furniture store incident. I should be rejoicing that we have any furniture at all, and much less a house to put it in.

I could complain today about my lack of time to do things around the house today. But instead I am rejoicing that I had time to fold two loads of laundry.....

I could complain today about the $100 plus dollars we had to spend this morning to have a drain snaked at our house. But today, I am CHOOSING to rejoice in the fact that we have running water, that is safe to drink.

I could complain that it's hubby's first day back at work, and the baby wants to be held and anytime mom holds her she thinks she HAS to nurse....

But I am rejoicing in the fact that Dad will be home in approximately an hour and I will have a chance to shower......(okay that one is a little shallow - but completely honest.)

Saturday, July 21, 2007

Customer is always right?

Remember the good ole days of customer service? Where the customer was right....and if the customer caught an error - the seller/company offered some kind of renumeration for their error.

Enter our day today - On the way to the furniture store that we had been trying to get to for 3 days we stop for takeout at a Wendy's. (They hate to see us coming with our huge order....) Anyway it took the cashier 3 times to get the order right and the window person 3 tries to get the order right when giving it to us. We waited in the drive thru 10 minutes! (We did get an additional free sandwich in our bag that the manager pointed out to us - although who was going to eat it on top of what we ordered?)

We finally make it to the furniture store (the security detail didn't stop us at the door) and find a floor sample sofa and chair that were being sold pretty inexpensively and we liked the comfort and color. We are told they are being sold as a set because they are floor samples and we agree to take them. Salesperson (very green from what we can tell) goes to ring them up and tells us that she can't sell us the chair because it isn't in the computer. Must have already been sold, she says! Hubby and I consider some other sets but aren't crazy about anything ( translate - everything is too expensive). We look at some bedroom furniture and come back and ask this salesperson to check with someone else about the sofa set - how can you not have the chair when it is sitting right here and says it is being sold WITH the sofa. Salesperson says "the chair is sold." Hubby and I leave a little dejected and discuss on the way home how to try and fix what we have....

On the way home we stop at Sonic and get drinks to cheer us up. First they try to give us someone else's order and then when the order is right - then try to charge us for someone else's food....(We are told it is her second day by the manager 5 or 6 minutes later - and she is working a busy drive-thru by herself on a Saturday?) No offer of a discount coupon here either....

When will employers learn that training your employees pays off in retention and customer satisfaction later?....

The kicker....when we get home there is a message on the answering machine from the furniture salesperson - she checked again and figured out the chair and sofa are available.....

The bright side - hubby and I did get to go out for the 15th anniversary last night. We went to a Japanese steak house and enjoyed the show and good food (and then rushed home to feed a hungry baby and change a diaper that exploded everywhere)......at least it wasn't Wendy's.....

Friday, July 20, 2007

Siblings...

We thought everyone was adjusting well to the newest addition. Sure we have had a couple of comments like "put the baby down" and "why do you get to touch her when she's sleeping?" We have also had a few more arguments between the middle two, and they have escalated quickly. I thought it was very revealing yesterday when we were preparing to leave the house on an outing together that dearest daughter #2 made the comment "Great! You know who will get all the attention!" Which is true? How many times today did someone stop and ask the older three anything except - are you the big brother/sister? (or some other question that relates to the baby). Everyone asked how old is the baby? Is it a boy or girl? (This question amazes me when the baby is dressed in pink stripes with a pink ruffle...) Was she born with that much hair? on and on the questions go....No wonder the older ones are a little upset....

Another day....

The baby had a rough night (translated: Mommy had a rough night). And of course son was still up with the sun at 6 am. Guess what - at 3 in the morning there is mostly Paid Programming on cable. I guess that is how they convince people to buy the contraptions or the music collections -- everything looks good at 3 am!! I finally settled for the O'Reilly Factor (is that the right name?) and after 1/2 an hour had a headache, with all that talking over each other....)

It must have been the VERY overripe banana that caused the son to get sick yesterday, because after the incident and a half hour or so of rest - he was his normal hyperactive self. I think he learned his lesson.

BTW - Have you noticed that the list of possible babysitters exponentially decreases with the increase in the number of children you have? Relatives even have to stop to think about it when you ask. I don't blame them! If you are not used to the chaos, it can take a lot out of you.

I guess we will try our plans from yesterday again today. Hopefully the furniture store parking lot cameras didn't record our escapade yesterday, and a security detail won't meet us today.....

Thursday, July 19, 2007

Trying again!

Okay - I've tried this before and not been very good at keeping a blog updated. Right now I am feeling pretty isolated from the real world after having my 4th baby 4 weeks ago, a 7 yr old with a broken arm 3 weeks ago and a 4 yr old with a 102 degree fever for 7 days last week. Maybe this will be a good way to vent.....

Today was going to be the first major outing as a family in the last month. A trip to the furniture store, a few garage sales, maybe a stop at the park....

So what happens in the furniture store parking lot? 4 yr old throws up! At least it wasn't in the van or in the store.... Then I find out from hubby that 4 yr old son consumed half of a very overripe banana at 6 am before both hubby and I were out of bed..... I knew that I should have tossed those yesterday.....

So back in the van to the isolation tent......(insert tears and kleenex here). At least hubby has been off on "paternity" leave to share the joy!!

Hubs and I have scheduled a night out 3 times in the last 2 weeks to go out and celebrate our 15th anniversary and aforementioned issues have prevented it..... I guess 16 will be more memorable!


I am a little nervous to have hubs go back to work and leave me with all 4. The older ones are a little bored with the whole staying at home thing too!


Okay - we finally gave in and got cable last week and I have watched WAY too many home improvement shows!

It has motivated hubby to do several things on the honey-do list (although the list continues to grow with every show I watch!)

Just saw something else - where's my list?